Well, to all of the people who actually try to read this I sincerely apologize! This is probably the first weekend since this summer that I have been able to do what I want to do, clean my room, spend time with the Lord, bake, visit my great grandmother, and dance like a fool around my room. It's pretty awesome...wow, this is what free time feels like.

With that being said, this year the Lord has really been teaching me to be thankful for everything! A lot of which I can think back to my experiences in Africa. I wake up praising Him for my warm bed, my hot shower, and everything in between. Standing under the hot water my breath was taken away just thinking of those freezing cold showers I took and that they take daily. I just love having such a thankful heart! I have to look at my crazy life and job through Scripture. Luke 12:48 says, "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded." Thank you Lord for entrusting me with so much!  

So lets travel back to July the 11th. We had just gotten to Uganda, and although we were not going to Jinja yet, I have never felt so many emotions that were not of myself. (Not to mention my luggage was currently lost and we all had only had a few hours of sleep.) I have been so excited to share this with you since the moment I experienced and wrote this. This is why I go. This is how I knew that my love for Africa was from the Lord. We were driving through Kampala, Uganda and this is what I felt:

"I just can't stop crying and thanking You and praising you God! 
I love the trash piles, the incredibly bumpy roads. 
I love being called Mzungu and the exhaust doesn't bother me anymore. 
I love how the traffic is compared to a parking lot and the huge holes in the roads. 
I love the way peoples goods are for sale on the side of the road and the beautiful handcrafted furniture.
I love that people ride on the tops of the loads of trucks and it is so dangerous, yet not to them.
Driving on the wrong side of the road intrigues me.
The Boda Bodas crack me up.
Eyebrow acknowledgements are humorous and I love how everything has an appropriate response of, 'It's okay' or 'It's no problem.'
Broken English has a way to my heart.
These are still the strongest women in the world!
I love how the weather is incredible and they are all bundled up.
I love the fruit.
The need for car washes even though it will inevitably be dirty in another five minutes.
Sheet metal is good for anything!
They are fabulous dancers. It's in their bones.
They love each other.
They sweep the dirt...? 
I love these people.
I love Uganda!"

That's all I've got for now  :)  Nkwagala nyo.

There and back.

Disclaimer: I really hate making these long because I'm always the one who skips over long posts because I'm not really one for reading super winded blogs. I will do my best to keep these as short and enjoyable as possible, and worth your time all the way to the end.   :)

Since the day I landed back on American soil my life has been go, go, go.  I feel terrible that I haven't been able to give people updates on my trip and forget about this blog because I usually just post everything straight to Facebook.  (Which, P.S. is where all of my pictures are.) A lot of people say, "I'm the worst blogger." As I almost typed that, I thought, well I guess it's just something you are either good at, or not good at...well I'm not good at it and like Facebook better.

It is a weird feeling being back. While I was on the flight back it really only felt like I had been gone for a day and now it never feels like I left.  I don't quite know why that is. Maybe it is because I have seen it before so it wasn't extreme shock when I got back? Maybe it is because we went to Canaan Children's Home last and that really feels like I just visited my second home? I don't know if it is okay to be comfortable when I get back? I will continue processing it all and I can already see how the Lord is still, and will continue to, reveal His purpose for that trip.  (Really praying that He sends me back for a longer time next time!)

So a quick overview of my trip.  It was AMAZING...I mean there are no other words to describe it! I love traveling and seeing different countries and I just love African cultures and the people and places. I felt at home!

Rwanda. It was very modern! I was expecting it to be similar to Uganda and it wasn't. There were mountains and it was all just an incredible sight. Very green and a cooler climate in the mountains. I read Left to Tell, by Immaculee Ilibagiza, a survivor of the Rwandan Holocaust, before I left. She did such an incredible job describing the sights and sounds that the whole time I was there I just imagined what it looked like during the holocaust with bodies everywhere.  It was the strangest feeling. At the Genocide Museum in Kigali, Rwanda, while the whole museum was incredibly moving, they had a section dedicated to children (which, you all know are so dear to my heart). There was a plaque at the end that said, "I didn't make myself an orphan." It was so touching to see and of course I was brought to tears by those simple words... That is why God commands us to love orphans!

Uganda. Home. Amaka. I cannot express in words how excited I was to be back! I knew after being in Rwanda for a few days that my love for Uganda was not of myself.  It was a love from our Father. Only a love that He could place in someone's heart.  Even while our luggage was stranded at the airport and I wore "dirty" (the American sense of the word) clothes, I could not imagine another place to not have all of the belongings that I packed. The first morning in Uganda, as we were driving, I was not crying, rather tears were just rolling down my face. I cannot explain it. It was amazing. My next post will be my emotion filled journaling about being back in Uganda. As I try to write more about my experience in Uganda all I can think of is the word, "love." So I will leave it at that for tonight.

Here we go again.

I am just so excited.  For some reason it is hard for me to really show it this time around but really, deep down inside I cannot wait to get back to that orange dirt and those sweet brown faces!

It has been sooo long since I have written. I was struggling with separating my time with the Lord and writing for an audience so I cut out the audience part. I have also been EXTREMELY busy as a new teacher and just being a fun twenty-one year old with a much needed summer break! It has been one fantastic break at that!

Well to update everyone, I will be spending a week in Rwanda and a week in Uganda. I was kind of disappointed that I will only get to spend just over two days at Canaan, where I left my heart last year, but I know that it is just all part of a perfect plan. That being said, we will be going to new ministries almost every day and it will be great to share the love. :)  I will be flying out of Charleston tomorrow (Tuesday) at 7pm and arrive in DC. I will spend the night with my team in DC and head to Africa on July 4th just before noon. (Trust me, I will be thinking patriotic thoughts the whole flight.) I am totally praying, and ask that you do the same, that I am able to sleep on the flight there and back. I am awful at sleeping on flights and those are some LONGGGGG flights to stay awake for...boo.

I will do my best to post here when we have internet to let people know when I safely arrive and hopefully some highlights.

We will appreciate every prayer sent to our wonderful God while we are away, specifically:
-Safety and health!!!!!
-Unity
-That our luggage and donations make it untouched
-That in all that we do, we are bringing glory to Jesus' name
-That we offer ourselves and the gifts that the Lord has blessed us with to serve as Jesus did!

Y'all, I really am so pumped about this trip and am already wondering where I will be sent next!

Thank you for your thoughts and prayers. It really means a lot knowing that we serve a perfect and good God that WILL listen!

Joshua 1:9 says, "...Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go."

Love y'all!

Great Excitement.

I am headed out to school for one of my last weeks (and it's teacher appreciation week!) but I just couldn't wait to share this exciting news! I will surely post more details as soon as I have another free second and as I find out more information.

I will be traveling to Rwanda and Uganda instead of Kenya and Uganda for the safety of our team.  For some strange reason I am just overjoyed! Long story short, the Lord strangely put Rwanda on my heart since I was in Africa last summer.

Anyways, I will try to get back on here soon with more details but I just could not wait to share!

Long time.

Hey y'all! I have been feeling so guilty that I haven't posted in such a long time! On this gloomy day, I finally found the perfect opportunity! Posted up on the couch in sweats watching the cooking channel with my dog :)

I have been up to my ears in to-do lists. Yes, usually more than one.  My kindergartners are giving me a run for my money and well, I'm a pushover. It has been one crazy blur these past three months, but I love it! I am even more excited for next year when (God willing) I will have my own new group of kiddos that I can start fresh with. Pretty cool that I'm 21 years old with a retirement plan. I am surrounded by amazing people at work! Many of my co-workers point me straight to the Lord and I love that! I got the coolest poster from one of them that is a constant reminder of my purpose in that classroom! It is such a great reminder that I keep right beside my desk. I have also joined NewSpring Charleston! The sermons are great and filling and it never fails that in every message, something sticks out right at me!

One reason I haven't written in a while is about two months ago, during my quiet time I began writing my prayers and by the time I finished I realized I got carried away and was writing for an audience. I was really convicted in who I was talking to and why I was doing that. I really needed to separate my quiet time with the Lord and blog writing time. That being said, I am not promising updates often but hopefully more closer to Africa time!

In December, my sweet friend Abby ventured to Kenya and Uganda without me. It is so incredible what the Lord taught her in going on that trip "alone". I was pretty sad that I was not going with her but it was a really awesome and a very clear answer from the Lord of where he wanted me to be and I had to be patient and flexible for His answer. While she was there she got to see my sweet boy Henry! He recorded the sweetest message for me and him and Yotham wrote me letters and signed them "Your Beloved Son." Ahhh I can just picture the day when I pull up to Canaan and run off of that bus and embrace those boys and Rose!!!! I have $1000 more to raise before July. I am confident that the Lord will provide and if you feel that is through a financial contribution of any amount, please contact me to find out how!

Well that is all for now. Just waiting to see what the Lord has in store for my future and super pumped for my next trip to Africa! Matthew 6:33, trying to keep my eyes on Him.

Lately.

I have been so very busy so it's been a while. 

I accepted my first job offer at a local elementary school as a kindergarten teacher on November 23rd.  This job is a huge blessing and gift from God! I even have a Faith, Isaiah, and Jeremiah in my class, haha. The whole story is pretty crazy if you ever want to hear it.  For the past few weeks I have been to the school a few days a week to "shadow" the teacher, meet the kids, and learn the ropes.  I am SO SUPER EXCITED to get started!  I will be working on my classroom for the next few weeks. Pictures promised! 

I took two days off to GRADUATE! I graduated from the University of South Carolina on December 12th! It happened so fast and doesn't even seem real yet. I was able to graduate in three and a half years with Magna Cum Laude honors and a 3.87 GPA. I am really proud of myself and thankful for all that the Lord did for me in college.  It is so hard to believe I am a college graduate. I already miss my friends and the college atmosphere so much!!!! My advice to anyone else: don't ever graduate! 

All that being said, and as mentioned in my previous post.  It is still my plan to go back to Africa in July!!! I still cannot wait to see those sweet children and am so excited for my sweet friend Abby to go in December! In the mean time, I get to love on sweet five year olds who need to see the love of Christ expressed through my actions and love. 

Life at home is different.  My social life has drastically decreased! I will also be looking for a church to attend. Something else that has been on my mind is how weird this stage in life is.  Now don't get me wrong, I am SO excited for everyone, but it seems like a good 50% of girls my age are engaged or soon to be engaged.  I know it comes in spurts, it's just something I will have to get used to.  I confidently trust that the Lord will provide for me! This is such a great reminder about waiting for God's best for me: http://www.jwowen.com/?p=1409.

"As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you. Abide in my LOVE."  John 15:9

Relief.

I am feeling very excited and relieved right now!

About two weeks ago I heard of a job opening. Tuesday I had a clearance interview with the school district. Also on Tuesday I had a spur of the moment interview with the principal. Wednesday after I bought my graduation dress, I was walking down King St. and got a call from the district office offering me the job! I will start Thursday with two days off to graduate! CRAZY! I am incredibly excited!

Last Monday, on the way home for my Tuesday interview, I was distraught about fundraising for my quickly approaching trip to Africa. I have been torn up with no clear yes or no answer from God on this particular trip.  I feel I just got it. The elementary schools start back January 3rd and I would have been in Africa until the 8th. I feel like the job was God's way of saying, "I've got this! Relax!"

So I am relaxing as much as possible with my new job about to start before I even graduate.

I will still need more funds to go to Africa this summer and more than my trip cost to donate to the many ministries we will visit during our time there, I just have some more time and can be more devoted to a summer trip and also my new students!

He has a plan!
It's incredible!
It's often hard to decipher.
It's not always what we think is the right thing.
We are promised that it will always work out.

Until then, my sweet friend Abby can go check on those babies and give them lots of love. Check out her blog at http://www.abbyhilderbran.blogspot.com.

To God be the glory!

Emotion.

I am completely overwhelmed with emotions right now! Hysterically crying, smiling, laughing, praying, crying some more.

We just got off of our first conference call for my December Africa trip. When we started talking about the itinerary, specifically Canaan Children's Home,
I could picture every sweet face.
Those sweet boys.
Beautiful girls.
Grace.
I can still feel that soft skin.
Those beautiful smiles.
The joy.
The pure love of our Father.
The beautiful dirt.
Warm hugs.
(Also waking up to bat squeaks and the Muslim call to prayer in the morning.) :)
All of my emotions towards Africa resurfaced. Part of me feels disgusting that I am able to go back to my daily, school and world worshiping life. I am so incredibly thankful that the Lord sent me in the first place to teach me so much. I really can't even find words to explain how I feel right now.

Jesus is always holding those children and loving them more than I can imagine.

Thankful.

Matthew 25:31-46

If you want to know how you can help, please contact me at machinnis@gmail.com.

Together.

The school I am student teaching at is one huge family! We sing Love Can Build a Bridge by the Judds and Together We Can Change the World. I just heard Together We Can Change the World for the first time today and I had to walk away from the video so that I wouldn't cry. Seeing the sweet African faces in this video and hearing their sweet voices singing in their best English is just the sweetest! I miss them so much!

Check the song out at http://www.togetherwecanchangetheworldsong.com/.

Help the Canaan kids!

http://www.withwingedfeet.blogspot.com/

Check this out!!! A sweet friend of mine, the girl who inspired me to go on my first trip, has started this program to ensure that the children at Canaan Children's Home in Uganda are eating a well balanced meal. You can help for just $8 a month...think about what you spend more than $8 a month on (Starbucks, alcohol, McDonalds, parking tickets, etc.).

Trust.

I am really having to trust that the Lord will provide.

I am not writing this to gain your pity or persuade you to donate, that is for you and the Lord to decide. This is just how I am feeling right now.  I am discouraged.  Half of my trip money was due last week and I have just under 1/4th of what I need to go on this trip. I am confident that the money will come from somewhere because our God promises to fulfill the desires of our hearts (Psalm 37:4).  I ran across these encouraging verses the other night and am clinging to them in this time of need.

"And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus." -Philippians 4:19


In the words of Jesus Christ, "So I say to you: Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened." -Luck 11:9


Praying that I can continue to trust in the Lord and for comfort if this trip is not His plan for me. If you haven't yet read this, I hope it impacts you as it does me.  It brings me to tears every time I read it.

"When I think of Africa, the following images immediately come to mind: Starvation. AIDS. Child soldiers. Genocide. Sex slaves. Orphans. From there, my thoughts naturally turn to how I can help, how I can make a difference. "I am needed here," I think. "They have so little, and I have so much." It's true, there are great tragedies playing out in Africa everyday. There is often a level of suffering here that is unimaginable until you have seen it, and even then it is difficult to believe. But what is even harder is reconciling the challenges that many Africans face with the joy I see in those same people. It's a joy that comes from somewhere I cannot fathom, not within the framework that has been my life to this day.

The images spilling out of my television showed circumstances that could seemingly only equal misery, and I was fooled. I bought into the lie that circumstance defines happiness. The truth is, in Africa I find hearts full of victory, indomitable spirits. In places where despair should thrive, instead I find adults dancing and singing, and children playing soccer with a ball crafted of tied up trash. Instead of payback, I find grace. Here, weekend getaways are not options to provide relief from the pains of daily life. Relationships and faith provide joy. Love is sovereign.

My new reality… I know now that my joy should have no regard for my circumstances. I'm ashamed by my lack of faith, but at the very same moment I am excited by my new pursuit. I'm forced to redefine the meaning of having much or having little. I'm uneasy with the prospect of change and of letting go, but just the thought of freedom is liberating. I want what I have learned to trickle down from my head into my heart - I no longer want to need the "next thing" to have joy.

I'm not saying that Africa does not need our efforts. It absolutely does need our partnership. But for me, I've come to understand that I NEED AFRICA MORE THAN AFRICA NEEDS ME. Why? Because it is Africa that has taught me that possessions in my hands will never be as valuable as peace in my heart. I've learned that I don't need what I have and that I have what I need. These are just a few of this continent's many lessons. I came here to serve and yet I've found that I have so much to learn, and Africa, with all its need, has much to teach me."

www.themochaclub.org/i-need-africa

Impact.

Something really unexpected, emotional, wild, etc. happened tonight.  I got an email earlier today from Visiting Orphans about a church our of California that has partnered with Return Ministries Uganda, the second ministry we visited during my stay in Uganda.  (The Lord is using Pastor Samuel in some incredible and life changing ways!) A few hours later I got another email yet this time from Pastor Samuel with this link (click here). Sitting in my living room I pull up this video on my phone. I was watching it thinking, "Wow! I miss these kids!" picking out faces I recognized, longing to go back and wishing Africa wasn't so far away. About five minutes in I started wondering how long this video was until something caught my eye.  If you watched the video you may not have noticed but having unfolded, sorted, folded, packed, repacked, and repacked some more, unpacked and distributed, making sure each dress got to a loving home, I noticed right away the fabric of one of the dresses my grandmother and her friends made that I took to Africa with me! I immediately stopped the video and choked back tears! It has been about four months since my team visited Uganda and the effects of our visit, and what the Lord is doing, are still being seen.

I don't know the full story behind what the team was doing but my assumption is the large duffel bag of stuff we dropped off just got sorted through and that team was seeing that the resources were being given  where they saw needs. What a blessing! The dresses are at 5:04, a pink plaid dress, at 5:22 a rust colored dress with tan ties, and at 6:37 a green dress with red strawberries (that is the dress that originally caught my eye).

I am praying that God will send me back on the December trip and I am trusting in His plans, however, I am still running very short in the amount of money I need to raise by December.  That was just one example from many of how your support can have a ripple effect with lasting visibility. Would you consider partnering with me and supporting my December return?  For more information contact machinnis@gmail.com.


I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to his service. -1 Timothy 1:12

Support. Hope.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2A5jyHNGLHE

This video is very similar to the one I made when I first returned in July. I fixed it up a little and am asking for your partnership for my return in just two short months.  I have about two months to raise just under $4,000.  Please let me know if you have any questions or fundraising ideas.  I am also open to speaking at any meetings or events. You can contact me at machinnis@gmail.com.

Thanks and God bless!

Graduation countdown: 49 days :(
Africa countdown: 65 days!

Just came across this blog post and read it through tears. Since I haven't really shared many details from my trip I'll start here (advanced apologies for being vague, not sure how many details I can share)...Towards the end of the Uganda week of our trip we left Jinja and headed to Kampala to a children's prison.  Sixty Feet is a ministry currently working in the prisons to minister to the children and do as much as they can to provide basic necessities for these children who live in unimaginable conditions. Anyways, we rode our bus about three hours, I think, to what we thought was where we were meeting a staff member of Sixty Feet who was going to take us into the prison.  When we pulled up to where we thought was the right place, no one was there so we called and found out we were at the wrong one and were too far from the one we should have been at. I was pretty bummed because I really wanted to go but we knew that God had a plan! That night, the guy from Sixty Feet came to our guest house and spoke to us about how much they needed our help and I just felt awful that we couldn't go. I was wondering why on Earth we couldn't switch our schedule around to be able to go and just pretty bummed out.  That same night I started feeling kind of sick so I went up to my room after he finished talking to our group.  There was a smaller group of people that stayed to talk to him and worked it out to where a few of them were able to go the next day into the prison.  When I heard about it I wanted even more to go and was extra bummed out because I missed that opportunity.  The next night our group got together to talk about our day since we had split into two groups.  The group from the prison began sharing their experiences and I just can't even begin to do their experiences justice if I tried to retell them.  It is hard to even think about the description of how these children live without crying and asking God, "Why? Why your precious children? They are innocent." Needless to say, we were all very upset listening to these stories of hope or lack of. I knew then that God knew I probably could not have held it together had I gone. He is faithful and has a purpose and plan for everything regardless of our "plans"! I encourage you to check out https://SixtyFeet.org/2011/10/23/steadfast-love/ for just one story and God's promise for these children.  There, you will also find more information on Sixty Feet.  This is one of the places I may get to go to in December.

Whoa.

That is all I can say. (Also a warning: I haven't posted in a long time so I have a lot to get off of my chest and catch up on!) I just got home from school and this is the first day in about two weeks that I even have time to sit by myself and enjoy a leisure activity.  I have been so busy I can't even begin to tell you about it! While always busy, I feel so blessed!

This week I realized that I hadn't updated my blog in FOREVER! I am terribly sorry to those of you who do check for updates.  I couldn't even remember if I had mentioned my upcoming trip to Africa.  My days fly by so quickly that Monday, quicker than ever, turns into Friday.  I can't even try to explain how quickly my jam packed weekends fly by.  A lot has happened since my last blog post.  I turned 21!!!!!!! It was such a blessed birthday because my incredible friends constantly point me to Christ! I am probably one of the only 21 year olds that can say I remembered my birthday and was able to function the next day. Praise!

I will be the "full time teacher" in my classroom in 7 days.
I graduate 67 days.
I leave for Africa in 83 days.

I mean really, that list could go on and on... I have to finish my assignments before I start teaching in a week, find someone to live in my apartment, work, raise funds to actually get to Africa, survive until graduation, participate in my sorority, apply for jobs!!!!!, and still try to live somewhat of a normal college life while I still can.  The fact that I am leaving my second home so soon is really bittersweet! If you would have asked me four years ago where I was going to college it certainly wouldn't have been here, one of my favorite places on Earth.  God has such an awesome plan for my life! Thankfully, I have put my hope and future in His hands and am as calm as someone as busy as me can be (I think).

While this all sounds great, I, like any honest person, have been struggling as well. I think I mentioned this in one of my previous posts but I really feel convicted to share this because I know it is a common struggle. A few months ago and especially this time last year, I felt like I was the only one God wasn't "speaking" to. He had definitely changed my heart and my life, that was evident but I just still felt like I was missing something.  When I returned from Africa, it took me a while to get in the swing of life here but I starting spending real, quality time in the Word.  That is when I really noticed what it meant for God to "speak" to you. You may not hear a voice but there's just this feeling when you know you are right where God wants you.  It's not that God wasn't speaking to me, I just wasn't listening! Anyways, now that I have experienced such spiritual growth, I can totally tell when I am lacking.  Being as busy as I have been, I really haven't been spending time in the Word and I can tell.  The Lord desires a relationship with each and every one of us but just like any relationship, there has to be more that one person.  How amazing is the grace we receive and to know that even when we fall so short, He is waiting right where we left off, longing for us to run back to His arms just like an earthly father would! Praise the Lord for that!

Something so great happened this week, well besides being blessed with the most incredible friends and mentors EVER and being able to meet with them and talk about life and the Lord! My sweet friend, who has been to Africa, and I meet regularly and it is such a great opportunity to talk about our hearts and Jesus and she is just so encouraging to me! About a month ago, after reading Becca's blog, who is currently at Canaan Children's Home, I got so upset. I have the picture of me hugging those three sweet boys right beside my bed and thought of the song Albertine by Brook Fraiser. She says, "Now that I have seen, I am responsible." It is really such an incredible song and touching song and I listened to it the whole way back to the States.  I told myself I would never forget those children yet I realized that I slipped back into this lavished (and pretty disgusting) life that we live here in America.  I was just so upset with myself for "forgetting" about those children.  Amy reminded me that even if we really do forget about them (which will never happen), God never will! He loves those children more than anyone in the whole world could! Wow, I can't wait to embrace their tiny, soft, loving little bodies again!

...So back to what happened this week.  I have really been so worried about raising my support in time for my trip! Like really worried!!! And even more worried that I'm not more panicked than I already am. A really sweet girl whom I had never met before donated money, no questions asked, and then yesterday, I received my first support check. Though it is a very small amount in the grand total, it all adds up! When I got that check in the mail I could just hear God saying to me, "Do you not trust me? Really?" I found myself praising God and thanking Him! Lord I really do trust you! I trust that if I really am supposed to return to Africa on this trip, He will provide! My earthly self is telling me that there's no way I can do it in time and the Holy Spirit in me is reminding me of God's promises that "with God all things are possible." I ask that you partner with me in prayer that He will provide! If you feel like the Lord is calling you to support this trip, I would love to talk with you! You can reach me at machinnis@gmail.com.

I am reminded of my first favorite verse, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

One last note: If you are interested in joining Abby and I along with a team from Visiting Orphans this December on our Kenya/Uganda trip, there are still spots opened!!!!!!!!!! Ask me about it!

Yes I am alive.

And yes I am super, super busy. I am student teaching at a school 30 minutes away and student teaching is basically like being a teacher's aide with no pay.  Now don't get me wrong, it is incredible and I am at an amazing school but I just wanted to paint a picture for you of just how busy I am.  On top of that, I am trying to maintain somewhat of a social life.

On a super excited note, I am officially signed up to return to Africa on another Visiting Orphans trip!!! My heart is literally racing at how excited I am.  It is another two week trip from December 27-January 8 spending one week in Kenya and another week in Uganda.  I am praying that God will use my return to Canaan to show me very clearly His plan for me.  I literally have no clue what it is and there are so many options right now.  I strive to be in line with His will for my life no matter what that is.  Some more extremely exciting news is that I get to go with a very, very sweet friend of mine from USC, Abby.  You can check out her blog at http://www.abbyhilderbran.blogspot.com.

That being said, I will be raising support again but am trying to get super creative this time so that I don't sound like a broken record asking for money.  In the mean time, if you feel God is calling you to support my trip you can contact me at machinnis@gmail.com and I can give you instructions for donating online or mailing a check.

Another sweet friend of mine, Becca, who I found out about Visiting Orphans from and her pictures inspired me to go on my first trip, is living at the orphanage I LOVE for a few months.  You can read more about that at http://withwingedfeet.blogspot.com. She is so inspiring!

I have started studying Jeremiah and I just love this:

The word of the Lord came to me, saying, "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations." "Ah, Sovereign Lord," I said, "I do not know how to speak; I am only a child." But the Lord said to me, "Do not say, 'I am only a child.' You must go to everyone I send you to and say whatever I command you. Do not be afraid of them, for I am with you and will rescue you." declares the Lord.
-Jeremiah 1:6-8

"For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

For a little background information, I got back to the states from Africa a week ago today. A few days ago I read a verse from Nehemiah and was like Whoa, I totally need to be studying this. So, I have been reading through Nehemiah and learning so much about his faith and also reading these small devotionals that were given to us by Visiting Orphans to read during and after our trip called Experience and Reflect. To be honest I didn't really read much of Experience while I was there so that is why I am reading it now, but God totally wanted me to read it now.

The first thing I wanted to share was this quote, pg. 75 for my team who has them :). It says, "When we learn to see people with God's eyes, we see past the situations and see the souls God has created. We see people that God sent his Son to die for. We see people that have value and worth, people worthy to be served no matter what their outsides look like. We see what God sees."

Ok, so now I'm going to get a little deep, well maybe a lot deep. Fair warning this will probably be long. :)

This section, by Wade Landers, starts on page 41 with a checklist of possessions. Halfway through you begin to start feeling sick because you know where he is going with this. If you check off the majority of the list (if you are sitting at a computer right now then I'm sure you could too), then "you are one of the richest families in the world." He asks, "what are we doing with all our stuff?" Well good question Wade, you made me cry. Luke 12:15 are words from Jesus, "a man's life does not consist in the abundance of his possessions."

Here are some estimated statistics that he shared, "about three billion people live on less than two dollars per day; up to a billion people worldwide live in the slums; approximately thirty thousand children die every day from hunger and poverty-related diseases; and sadly, Americans spend over a hundred billion dollars annually on fast food!" I'm pretty sure those statistics probably have you feeling pretty disgusting because they sure did/do to me. I was reading that last night feeling a little hungry (not for long) and I sit here writing this eating a hot breakfast. Probably just last week I spent some time fretting over money. Well I definitely had more than $2 while I was worrying. Have I eaten fast food this week, surely. 

The passage then led me to read Luke 12:13-21, 32-34 but I suggest just go ahead and read Luke 12:13-34.  It is The Parable of the Rich Fool (AKA the rich American) and then Jesus commands his disciples (and us) "do not worry." "O you of little faith!" Jesus says to us. I think about that verse often. How do I continually have such little faith in the God of the universe and in our Savior who died for us? It was even harder reading that passage after experiencing such extreme poverty, seeing God totally provide for people with very little to nothing but the clothes on their backs and I worry daily about clothes, my car, jobs, money, my future...the list goes on.  Why? My Father was PLEASED to give me the kingdom! (Luke 12:32)

Reading the remainder of that section I could no longer hold back my tears from the conviction I felt. Laying in my big, comfy bed I got up to get a tissue. I look around. Stuff everywhere! (Now don't get me wrong, my room isn't a mess.) I have so much stuff moved into my apartment (not including the stuff at my parents house) that I am running out of clutter free places to put things.  I frequently complain about size of my room. Complaining that it is too small and looking forward to my own apartment or house with more room to put, you got it, stuff. I literally thought about that yesterday! The room I am sitting in is two times bigger than the whole house of the woman we visited in Korah and probably a large majority of people in third world countries. Now don't start to take this the wrong way. I am incredibly thankful for everything that I have been blessed with but I am clearly not obeying commands from Jesus himself! Luke 12:22-34. Verse 23 says, "Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes." If seeing what I saw did not show me that then I am blind! Verse 29-31, "And do not set your heart on what you will eat or drink; do not worry about it. For the pagan world runs after all such things, and your Father knows that you need them. But seek his kingdom, and these things will be given to you as well." I think it is safe to say that many of us, including myself, do this in the opposite order. We first seek stuff and then squeeze in time to seek God and his kingdom. 

Many people wonder, why is it that we are so blessed and have so much when there are billions of people with nothing? I strongly agree with what K.P. Yohannan writes about in his book, Revolution in World Missions. It isn't a sin or a bad thing to have everything we have.  It is how we use it. I have no clue why God choses us to have so much but I do believe that we have it in order to bless others with what we have and ultimately pointing them towards Christ. As I am writing this I was going to include the following quote so I Googled it to see who wrote it...um DUH! Right here in Luke 12 written by JESUS! Luke 12:48, "From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked." That is, in my opinion, the problem with many Americans, including myself. We have been given so much but do so little with what we have. So much of the stuff I have in bins crammed everywhere are clothes I still have for "when I get high school skinny again" (ha! jokes on me) or things that I "may use again for __(fill in the blank)__." I just thought about this last night but maybe I can have a yard sale or something and use the money to send me back to Africa. Ebay would never work, I would lose too much money... Just a thought. (Please let me know if you have any ideas.) 

One suggestion at the end of that section was to fast once a week. I can't even think about the word fasting without immediately thinking of the word, impossible. Then I remember Moses (with 60 Feet, the children's prisons) telling us how after the second day with nothing it feels like your blood is boiling. And need not I mention Somalia because I'm sure you have seen some pictures. The devastating fact is that children are starving everywhere all of the time regardless of peace or war. The Lord asks me to fast and I can't go like four hours without getting hungry and thinking about food, or giving in, when all around the world men, women, children, babies starve. 

Wow, God has really been speaking to me! The readings I "chose" (God totally planned it) spoke straight to me. 

Feeling very convicted.  Lord, I pray this is not a temporary feeling but that you would use me and everyone who this has reached in convicting us to serve you with all of our hearts. Help us to trust you wholeheartedly with every aspect of our lives and to worry no more. Thank you for everything you have blessed us with. Thank you Jesus for loving us so much and thank you Father for loving us so much regardless of our greed and sinfulness that you would continue to pour out your blessings on us and that you sent your Son so that we could one day live with you in your perfect kingdom. In Jesus' name, Amen. 

Please let me know if you want to find out more about any of the organizations you can help or want to talk with me. 

My feelings into words

I found this today and it is everything I feel but I didn't have my own words to say it. This is not my own advertisement for The Mocha Club, though they seem great, it is just literally, EXACTLY how I am feeling. 

https://www.themochaclub.org/i-need-africa

"When I think of Africa, the following images immediately come to mind: Starvation. AIDS. Child soldiers. Genocide. Sex slaves. Orphans. From there, my thoughts naturally turn to how I can help, how I can make a difference. "I am needed here," I think. "They have so little, and I have so much." It's true, there are great tragedies playing out in Africa everyday. There is often a level of suffering here that is unimaginable until you have seen it, and even then it is difficult to believe. But what is even harder is reconciling the challenges that many Africans face with the joy I see in those same people. It's a joy that comes from somewhere I cannot fathom, not within the framework that has been my life to this day.

The images spilling out of my television showed circumstances that could seemingly only equal misery, and I was fooled. I bought into the lie that circumstance defines happiness. The truth is, in Africa I find hearts full of victory, indomitable spirits. In places where despair should thrive, instead I find adults dancing and singing, and children playing soccer with a ball crafted of tied up trash. Instead of payback, I find grace. Here, weekend getaways are not options to provide relief from the pains of daily life. Relationships and faith provide joy. Love is sovereign.

My new reality… I know now that my joy should have no regard for my circumstances. I'm ashamed by my lack of faith, but at the very same moment I am excited by my new pursuit. I'm forced to redefine the meaning of having much or having little. I'm uneasy with the prospect of change and of letting go, but just the thought of freedom is liberating. I want what I have learned to trickle down from my head into my heart - I no longer want to need the "next thing" to have joy.

I'm not saying that Africa does not need our efforts. It absolutely does need our partnership. But for me, I've come to understand that I NEED AFRICA MORE THAN AFRICA NEEDS ME. Why? Because it is Africa that has taught me that possessions in my hands will never be as valuable as peace in my heart. I've learned that I don't need what I have and that I have what I need. These are just a few of this continent's many lessons. I came here to serve and yet I've found that I have so much to learn, and Africa, with all its need, has much to teach me."

Photographs

In case you haven't seen the pictures on Facebook, here are the links to my photo albums.  Hopefully I will be able to post some journal entries or thoughts and feelings in the future but I am still trying to take it all in and process everything.

Uganda photos: http://www5.snapfish.com/snapfish/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=4520312025/a=6483381025_6483381025/otsc=SHR/otsi=SALBlink/COBRAND_NAME=snapfish/

Ethiopia photos:
http://www5.snapfish.com/snapfish/thumbnailshare/AlbumID=4519628025/a=6483381025_6483381025/otsc=SHR/otsi=SALBlink/COBRAND_NAME=snapfish/

I needed Africa more than Africa needed me!

Like for real! We have an overnight flight tomorrow night and I will have to be dragged away! Short post for now but just pray that we have a safe return and that God would clearly show me what to do and where to go in my future. :) See y'all soon!

Update from Ethiopia

We arrived in Ethiopia last night. Today we spent the day in Korah, a leper community.  Ethiopians are beautiful!! The thing that has broken my heart so far is the treatment of the aminals. I started to type all of the details but I didn't want to make Ethiopia sound worse than it is.  It is just really, really, really sad! Surprisingly, Ethiopia is a completely different country from Uganda in so many ways. Anyways, we are about to have dinner and it is the rainy season here so it is storming so bad but I just wanted to let everyone know we were all safe.  Please pray with us for a continued safe trip and especially for our health.